the girly who shall end all girls

last week's questions because a) i failed to post then, b) more appropriate anyway.

1. What are you thankful for this year or are you just happy it’s nearly over?
i am always thankful for my chosen family, for my health, for C and Leela and clean water and safe food and having an income and health insurance and a nice home to live in.

i'm thankful that we didn't start a new war this year. *knocks wood* but i have to say that, and i've continued to wrestle with the destruction of my mental model of "America". i need this year to pass with the least damage possible.

2. When you have a traditional family get together, be it Thanksgiving, Christmas or for some other reason, is there a dish that you just have to have or something is missing?
if mom is cooking there needs to be home-frozen sweet corn that she or my brother has put up. (i am a vicious snob about sweet corn. commercially preserved sweet corn is rubbery and gross, and so is most corn-on-the-cob by the time it hits a grocery store. it can only be consumed if it is canned creamed corn, which i consider an entirely separate food.)

3. Do you like turkey?
yup.

4. Do you anticipate or dread family get-togethers?
how many layers of family? i get on well with my immediate family; even my sister is fully capable of being pleasant company for an afternoon. C's family is also pretty great. i am happy to see them but hate traveling to see them. when we start adding aunts/uncles/cousins, that's where things get dicey. one side is extra-Christian, the other side has an explosive mix of flaming liberals and guns-n-racism conservatives. prior to last year i would have said the extra-Christian get togethers were the most awkward, but prior to last year nobody shook the explosive mix container.

5. If you could get your family/friends to listen to you at one of these gathers, really listen to you, what would you say to them?
this seems like an invitation to talk about political or social issues or some family fight. as noted above, it depends who is in the room. but really, my immediate family has always been pretty awesome to me and i know that not everyone has that.

"I love you and I'm glad you're a part of my life."

* * *

i'm thinking a great deal about years and transitions since it was my birthday this week. last year's birthday is kind of a blank in my memory. not surprising, really, since i spent most of November mired in situational depression. i just hate that i don't know. there's very little i remember about November 2016 after the election; America was ruined, Leonard Cohen was dead. i stopped using facebook and i made one post on LJ that month. academically i know that the Sounders were on their MLS Cup run but i don't remember any details about that either.

Thanksgiving was good. pirate E and G made ham this year, partly because their oven was annoyingly unreliable last year, partly because with baby M in the house something had to give. and it was pretty great, we can do that again. we ate right on time (pirate D even came out), everything was delicious and then we all watched Buffy, as is tradition. baby M was on his best behavior, flirting with all and sundry and conveniently sleeping while the rest of us ate. Leela was also on her best behavior and didn't howl at anyone. A++, would feast again.

yesterday there was gaming, as is tradition, and C and i made a crockpot roast to share and a mix of new sides and leftovers. pirate A brought his homemade pumpkin pie. the food was a hit AND we defeated the manticore and re-consecrated the healing spring.

via thefridayfive

1) What is the first song you remember from your childhood?
tough to say. there was always music in my day to day life - Mom played the piano, there was always music playing around the house or in the car, everyone liked to sing along with whatever they were playing. when i was little my three siblings were still in the house but old enough to have their own music, so i was exposed to five different tastes in music.

i guess i'll say Bushel and a Peck because i definitely remember mom singing it to me when i was small enough to be rocked to sleep.

2) What is the first music you purchased with your own money?
pretty sure that was a cassette tape of Sports by Huey Lewis and the News. that's the one that had a bunch of hits, including I Want a New Drug.

3) What's a piece of music that you know by heart?
no, there is too much.

let's go with The Gambler. my dad had an 8-track of Kenny Rogers' Greatest Hits and we used to sing along in the car all the time.

4) What's a song that makes you turn off the music right away?
...i don't have that like i used to. i used to hate stuff that got overplayed, but the days of being unable to control what music is playing are over - i don't listen to commercial radio, i don't work retail, and i'm not stage managing musicals.

that said, i usually don't like to hear anything by Chicago.

5) And why?
there's something about Chicago's use of brass combined with Peter Cetera's voice that really sets my teeth on edge. there are certain tenor sounds that i just hate - Peter Cetera, Geddy Lee*...where i love the sound of Sting and Robert Plant. and i really like ska brass and the Blues Brothers.

but fuck Chicago.


*it has been a recurring minor conflict in my romantic life that i am largely unable to enjoy Rush because i hate the sound of the vocals. but apparently "likes Rush" is my type.

via thefridayfive

1) Do you want to get married?
no. i am already married. i would not like to change that.

did i want to get married? not for the sake of "being married", no. but certainly at the time i thought it was the natural thing to do to express our commitment and it continues to have financial and legal advantages that i consider very important. (it was also useful to get our families to treat us like full adults.) i know people who have been shut out of making medical decisions for their partner and that set of rights is very important to me.

2) Where would you like to get married?
if i could do it again, i'm kind of obsessed with this place, which remains mysterious but seems like it should be a private club. since i probably don't have the connections for that dreamy view, The Ruins would be nice. (it's hard to tell from the website, but that swanky eccentric inside is nested inside what looks like a rotting warehouse with trees growing through the broken roof.) or maybe i would make everyone go out to Kalaloch or Doe Bay. My one regret about my actual wedding and reception was that we didn’t have a pig roast.*

3) If you were getting married in a week, who would be in your wedding party?
is that a logistical question? there were no attendants when we got married, because to be honest neither of us had wedding-party-worthy friends living nearby. mimerki and scarlettina, I guess?

...I've never been in a wedding party. There's only one person I wish had asked me and we're no longer friends.

4) What would your wedding colours be?
at the actual event i had red roses, green ivy, and heather in my bouquet; my dress and my hair were trimmed with ribbon roses in a variety of colors. nothing matched. i suppose if i had to make things match they would be green.

5) Does marriage mean to you 'til death do us part?'
well, it's working out that way so far and i hope that it continues so, but i'd be lying if i said that i never had times of doubt. i feel lucky that we've been able to work that out.

so no, i don't think it can be "til death", at least not legally or religiously. i think everyone who gets married for love thinks that it's going to last. but i think that people grow and change over their lifetimes and maybe you were really perfect together in the moment, but you don't grow in complementary ways. when that happens, you should be able to go. unhappy marriage is the worst.

*in PA there was this dude who would bring the equipment to your house. He had a rotisserie smoker he towed behind his truck and he would cook, carve, and serve a whole hog.

Via thefridayfive

1. What is your current main mode of transportation? e.g. car, bike, subway, walking etc.
I'm car-free and multi-modal. Toss up between bus and walking.

2. Are you satisfied with your current main mode of transportation (answer to question 1)? Why?
Yes. I like reading and knitting, I don't like stop and go driving or hunting for parking.

3. Do you think you'll change your means of transit soon? e.g. buy a car, get rid of your car, walk more etc.? If so why?
No.

4. If time distance and money were not factors how do you prefer to get from point A to point B?
train. (we have talked about moving to light rail.)

5. What was your worst transit experience?
depending on a taxi that never arrived.

1. Do you like to shop? Why or why not?
yes. gathering things makes something in the old basic part of my brain really happy.
2. What was the last thing you purchased?
Bed, Bath & Beyond - steel mixing bowl, SilPat, salt cellar w/little spoon, shelving steps, and one of those thingys to defeat the overflow drain and let me fill the tub full
3. Do you prefer shopping online or at an actual store? Why?
actual store. i like to browse and i like to see and feel product. i'm big on quality for price. i only buy stuff online if i've already seen the item in real life, or intangibles like concert tickets.
4. Did you get an allowance as a child? How much was it?
nope. but i did periodically get all the loose change from the bottom of mom's purse if i put it in rolls. it could really add up.
5. What was the last thing you regret purchasing?
a new VCR. the old one wasn't working, but it may have just needed a thorough head cleaning, and the new one isn't as nice a machine.

Friday five

1. What food do you like that most people hate?
scrapple, especially when they know what's in it

2. What food do you hate that most people love?
fresh tomatoes

3. What famous person, whom many people may find attractive, is most unappealing to you?
Gwyneth Paltrow

4. What famous person, whom many people may find unappealing, do you find
attractive?
Harvey Keitel

5. What popular trend baffles you? ultra low rise jeans

BTW, C got home safe, but thanks.